Hi,
I got my first horse nero a little over a year ago, he is a very sensitive, very dominant gelding. When I first got him everything was fine, he has always been sharp but that never botherd me. I was nervous for the first six months and basicly took back seat to nero and everything went his way and i fear it was the worst thing in the world I did as now I have gained my confidence I started trying join-up and getting him to do what I wanted to do and he has basicly flip out and has a temper tantrum with everything.
He is great with the dually but when I try to send him away for join-up he will come right at me and rear up over my head as he knows I back off when that happens I try not to step back and send him away even more but he will kick and bite me until I have to leave the round pen.
When mounting he is sometimes and angel but othe times when he doesnt feel like it he with move around/try to bite and kick/spin anything to stop me getting on his back. Riding he is fine does throw tantrums in the conner when he doesn't want to do something but I seem to get threw to him when I'm riding and He does what I would like willingly with no force.
Basicly he is a well mannered lovely boy except when I want to do something he doesnt want to do he flips out and goes mental. I just can't afford professinl help and I have tried to sell him to someone more knowlegable but he doesn't like new people handling him and is worse for them than me.
I just don't know what to do I'm doing somthing wrong but all the people at my yard say is 'hit him, give him a good smack' and can't and will not do that. and I don't want to avoid all the things he wants to do. help. Comfort, Telling off anything would help.
Paige,
I know you say you can't afford pro help with Nero, but saving up and paying for 2 or 3 months of pro training for him will be far cheaper in the long run than any hospital bills you will have because he hurts you. You have described a very dangerous behavior pattern and if this is your first horse, I am assuming you don't have the level of experience to handle his issues. With the behavior you describe, I can only urge you to not take your life in your hands by riding him or trying to train him without help. Perhaps there is a trainer nearby who would accept stable work in exchange for his services? Please, please find some way to get a pro to help you with this guy. Your life and his are at stake. I'm sure that with help, Nero will come around. He needs leadership and the comfort of safety that horses draw from being shown that he has someone to be his leader. He will be dangerous until he can settle in his own mind that he doesn't have to be. A trainer can teach you both how to achieve that.
In the meantime, only do activity that you and he can be safe at. If handwalking is all you can do, then do that. Perfecting how he leads(nose at your shoulder, stopping when you stop, walking when you walk at your speed, not his)will go a long way towards establishing your leadership role with him. And I urge you to please wear a helmet while you work with Nero, even on the ground, until he is more settled in his behavior. Safety should be your first concern when working with him.
And well done, by the way, on rejecting violence as the answer. It's not. Good luck, stay safe, and keep us posted on your progress.
I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time. I know how hard it is to be in fear when working with a horse that you also love and want to work with. I agree with julie m. that leadership may be a big part of the reason Nero is acting like he is. I recently bought a book called "Perfect Confidence" by Kelly Marks (Monty's first student) and it talks a lot about being a leader. You might check it out!
Hi Page, I absolutely agree with julie m. and ealight. Please find professional help. I have had similar experience with my first own horse who is a young colt who's way to refuse to listen by biting - hardly ! I had to make a new plan, step back and watch another person working with him and it helped me so much. If you don't stop trying things you already know you cannot really get him to, it is like a circle: you try it-he refuses and hurts you-you loose confidence and he feels that and does not feel save re your actions and his behavior will become worth. Love him for his good actions and as ealight says, do theses littel improtant and easy things like leading him and save money and find a good horseman or woman who helps. Good Luck, VioBerlin
Hey, thank you so much for your replies. Does anyone happen to know of a good proffesional in north west england?
Hi Paige, if you go to www.intelligenthorsemanship.co.uk you will find the recommended associate for your area who will be able to help. I cannot stress enough how much I agree with everyones comments on here, it is vital that you get some help. Congratulations to you for admitting your frear and your situation, it is not easy I know. Best wishes, Vicci
Hi Paige,
Where exactly are you in the north west? There is a new Certified Monty Roberts Instructor that has just returned from the USA who may also be able to help you as she is based in the North - her name is Jo Birkbeck. You can find her on facebook...
Paige, Sorry to hear you are having problems with your horse. I would be very happy to talk to you and discuss what we can do together to help your situation. I run a freelance business schooling and instructing and also take horses in for backing and further schooling. As Laira mentioned I have just returned from the States and use a successful combination of methods including Monty's to help both horse and rider. I would be very interested to talk to you. My e mail is jojo19792008@live.co.uk .I live between kendal and Lancaster and am happy to travel. Take care, Jo