Something you might try, go out in the corral and sit down, ignore her, walk around the corral, but ignore her. Do this all day if you can, but at least as much as you can. Dont try to touch her, or talk to her, just ignore her. Horses are curious,m and sooner or later she WILL come over and sniff at you, dont move, ignore her. After a day or 2, you should be able to touch her nose, but dont push anything. It sounds like your horse needs a lot of time. When you are aitting, you are small, not big, and she will be less afraid of you. Dont worry, she isnt going to step on you, I have done that with several wild horses, and it works. The first mustang I got, I went out, sat down in the corral, and read a book and ignored him. Same thing the second day, but he came over and sniffed my hair. I ignored him. After a few days, I could reach up when he sniffed and pet his nose and face, moving very slowly at all times. Within a week, he would follow me when I walked around the corral, and I could pet him, and got a halter on him. So you might try that.

Monty has a video out called "You and your wild horse", in this video of a wild mustang he starts by first allowing the wild horse to bond to another older gentler horse to use as a buddy for him, then uses a shoot system to hold the wild horse in with the other horse and begin gentling him where he can't run away, the wild horse is kept calm by always having the buddy horse to be with him, he spends a day working extensively with the horse before join-up. This is an excellent video it's very lengthy and show's you everything you need to know to start your horse. There's a lot more to it then I can explain here it would be worth your time to buy the video or check with your local library and see if they have it or can get it for you.

Hi RamonaWagner - it would be so good to know something of your horses background as I find that helps so much in our understanding of them. Is there anyway you can find out where she came from and what experiences she has had? From what you describe it sounds as if she has either never been touched by humans and allowed to run wild or has been severely brutalised by humans so that she is terrified of them. Either way if she is now 7 years old she has learnt to distrust humans and be wary of them so it will be extremely difficult to quieten her and gain her trust. If it was me I would put the time in to get her as quiet and trusting as possible and then I would seek out the help of a Monty Robert's type professional - that is assuming you are not one yourself!! Horses this old and this scared are so much more challenging, dangerous and difficult to train than a young one. If you do have an older quieter horse or can borrow one then it may be good to have it in the yard with you when you start your "let's get acquanted" programme. Horses scared of humans get some confidence if they see another horse is happy to go up to them and be petted etc. I would only use the buddy for a few early sessions as ultimately you want your horse to accept and trust you and not the buddy. Once the buddy leaves I like phantommustang1 suggestion - as long as your mare is safe and not inclined to charge you then just spend time alone in an enclosed area with her. Just sit there with her for some time each day. During this "let's get acquanted" time you may occasionally give her some food in a container in the enclosed area - walk up side ways, eyes averted, as close as you can and place the container on the ground and then walk away. Each time you take the food to her try to get closer before you place the container down and leave. Hopefully within a few days she will allow you to go right up to her. Once this happens then you may try slowly approaching her without the container but maybe with an apple or carrot in your hand (Ooops! apologies to Monty but it is effective for gaining the trust of very untrusting, scared horses). Once you get close enough then slowly start to stroke her -removing your hand again if she is at all concerned then bringing it back. Perhaps she will nibble on a carrot which you hold in one hand while you start to gently stroke her on the neck with the other. If you can eventually get to walk up to her and stroke her then try introducing the headstall of a halter. If you can eventually get the headstall on then well done. Leave it on for a few minutes then take it off again. Next time leave it on for longer. At this point I would seek help!
You may even wish try join up again before the trainer comes as then it will be easier for the trainer to achieve. If she is just wild and hasn't been brutalised then she should eventually join up with you but it may take some time. Maybe try in the morning when you have plenty of time - all day if necessary - keep it fairly low key send her off but keep the body language a bit down - once she has her initial flight is over just let her settle into trotting around you. You may not get all the signs so when you get some try turning and see if she responds. Note this first join up with a wild horse is a slow process for Monty too. It took him over 24 hours to join up with Shy Boy and in the video mentioned by Kleinne he relies on a buddy go gain the horses trust. Apologies all - another long one! - but I hope it helps. Please remember that if you are not very experienced seeking the right help is important as these older horses can be dangerous because they are now so scared and it has become inherent to them to be so. For example if once you get the headstall on and you click a lead rope on and attempt to hold or lead her she could panic and take off. You could be injured and regardless you would undo all your good work and progress you have achieved. That is why I would seek professional help at this point even if I had achieved a successfully achieved join up and follow up.

Sorry for the typos and poor editing in the above!!

Good morning Ramona,
It was great you did join-up with the horse..
Keep watching the video on join-up over and over until it is imprinted on your mind.
This will help you to do it correctly. That's what I had to do.
Never work a horse until it is sweaty, they are not learning at this point.
Try to always leave your sessions on a postive note. One tiny successful session left on a postive note does wonders for your confidence and theirs.
After watching Monty do join-up try again. Watch carefully, his body language and his instructions on what he is doing. You will succeed, I promise.
It's the best thing you can do and watching him instruct on how to get follow-up, the weaving and eyes, wow.
He is our best teacher and when I re-watched the videos several times my join-up was very successful.
I have a channel on youtube and you can see the difference between my join-up and my husbands.
In mine she does join-up and followed up but my body language was all wrong.
With my husband, I was instructing him on his movements (after watching Monty several times) and his was great.
Watch the videos, they really help. Monty knows what he is doing and is a great teacher.
Hope this helps,
Ronda

Wow thanks a lot for all your answers!!!
Phantommustang1 that’s exactly the way I was going on for the last 3 weeks. I did nothing with her. I spent hours just cowering in her coral and ignoring her… :-)
After about two weeks I was allowed to touch her nose and give her a short rub on her forehead. But I’m afraid that was too fast for her cause the last few days we made more a regress than a progress that’s why I tried a Join Up. But then she reacted like she was in a huff… :-/
Think you’re right she needs loooooooots of time and patience and I will give her now everytime she needs and think that’s the right way for her?!

Last week I tried that with the buddy horse as well but it didn’t work either!
Maya didn’t like the other horse and was chasing her day and night! :D So I decided to seperate them again.

Thanks Kleinne for your video hint! I’ll try to get it!
I already spent nights with watching his videos and reading his books, studying Equs but it’s hard if nobody is telling you what you are doing wrong.
So you‘re right Star I have to watch it over and over again to remember every single detail and I hope my Join Up is getting better!

I’d love to find out more about her past and what happened to her.
I was told that she has already been ridden but I don’t know if that’s true and I don’t know how I could find out more cause I got her from a dealer in France - who would have sent her on a transport to Italy going to the butcher. Her past owner wasn’t even involved. The dealer won’t/can‘t tell me anything. Those are evil human beings… :-(

So, what do you think? Should I go on with trying to join her up quitting as soon as a tiny progress is cognisable or should I just spend more time in her coral ignoring her till she thinks „okay I think it’s time for me to trust that creepy little monster cowering in my corral“? ;)

If anything else is occuring to you just let me know. I’m right here waiting and grateful for your suggestions.

Ramona

Well, you dont need to cower. If she was mine, I would do that, just hang out in the corral and ignore her, walk around some but dont try to get close, read a book, listen to the radio, (nothing wrong with that!) Maybe even toss a rope around a bit, but not near her and not fast. Just pretend she isnt there. My son used to go out and read books on horsemanship to them, not sure if THAT helped, but it didnt hurt any, just made me laugh.

hihi... I'm a little bit desperate so I try everything that might work. Even cowering! ;)

And I think I'm gonna try reading on some Monty books to her! Maybe that'll change her mind! ;-) That's THE idea! Thanks! :-D

Well, thank my son, hes the one that did it. He was about 12 at the time and has asked me how he should get the new wild horses used to jhim, I said go out and talk to them, play the radio, anything he could think of, so thats what he did, he read to them.

Ramona - sounds as if you have tried most thing so well done. Plus you have made progress so I would just continue with what you are doing and leave the join up for awhile because if you are not successful you will set her back again. If she has been ridden then I suspect it is extremely brutal human treatment that has made her so scared so she is unlikely to join up with you until she feels she can trust you more. If the buddy idea failed then she has obviously also been picked on badly by other horses too. Keep up the good work - she will probably enjoy listening to Monty's book. Good luck - apologies for such a long response last time - you have it all under control!!

HI Ramona

I had very similar problems to you with my little welsh section a - he was bought by a girl on the yard I was on as he was a smashing 'unhandled' pony running with a herd in a field. He turned up with a filthy head collar on (who knows how they got that on!) with a peice of string attached - which you could just about grab to clip on a lead rope, he lead beautifully but once loose you could not get near him, he was turned into a stable and basically stood there shaking and ran to the back of the stable when a human came anywhere near - he did buddy up with my highland and they became firm friends, he could be lead in and out by carefully catching the string on the head collar and with patience the girl could eventually touch his nose but that was it - he did however love rocky the highland who soon became him rock in life! No progress was made and he wnet out in the field with the othe horses - the girl got the chance of a job and seeing he was so attached to rocky (and was just the loveliest fella!) I said I would keep him on, we could herd him in and out as he would follow rocky everywhere but tocuhing or even getting a head collar back on was near on impossible) I tired sitting with him, hand feeding, ignoring him but going about my business, he would now camly stand near me but no touching allowed, I was desperate and after several very upsetting attempts were made by well meaning people to get a head collar on him I went looking for answers and discovered montys methods. I tried join up - which he did - he would follow me everywhere but still I couldn't touch him. I then found kelly Marks book - handling the untouched horse and using this method i was able to get a rope around him and lead him a little, getting a head colllar on though or any other handling was still a challenge so I looked again and found that intelligent horsemanship ran a handling the untouched horse course - I did the five day foundation and then the untouched horse and this was really the start of a journey for me which I have continued and am now going through all the training to learn these methods and work with them once I have done all the training - using the methods I learned I was able to eventuallly touch the pony all over and get a headcolar on and off - it has been a long journey but I can now hug him which is awesome ;0) The methods I used were montys advance and retreat method (picnic - positive instant consequence, negative instant consequence) I used a long stick with a padded end and when he ran away the stick folloed and when he stood still the stick went away - soon I could touch him all over (apart from the ears which to this day are still iffy!) and the stick got shorter and shorter till I was tocuhing him with my hand and with a rope and eventually a head collar opened up which I fastened round his neck then his nose - it has been such an amazing and rewarding journey for me to now have this pony in my life (he and rocky the highland are still best friends) and I couldn't have asked for a better teacher - I could not have done any of it without monty roberts, kelly marks, ian vanderberge and the intelligent horsemanship society. I hope this helps and I wish you the very best on your journey with your horse

Karen

Great advice and a great story, Karen.

Hi Karen!
Wow thanks for sharing your story!
While reading it I had goosebumps all over!

You gave me a little hope and think I'm gonna try that it couldn't get worse so there's nothing I have to loose.

Thanks a lot

Ramona

Dear Ramona
You speak of a horse you can't touch, which is not true. You can already touch him, so you did the first step already. I agree with Karen that you need a careful desensitization in small steps. It will be crucial that you do it in the right way to not reinforce the behaviour. The progress will not be linear, if things go worse, you have to go backw one or two steps and restart again there. Be patient with you and your horse.
Rudi

I remember an old trainer who said keep on setting your posts and ignore the horse, and sure enough with my latest abused horse who pins his ears,he came to me when I was busy doing stuff in the corral.Sitting still and waiting for them can seem like pressure and also seem predatory,plus it is hard to stand up real slow without scaring him off.I do not feed by hand,and I do not touch the face with very spookey horses,infact I touch them less until they are almost rubbing on me..I have found that if I start the licking and chewing it almost always results in their jaw opening and they also start doing that!My horse had a tight mouth ,but I stood beside him, on loose rope, just breathing in sync with him ,then cracked my jaw making a squelchy noise and there it was ,he unclenched his jaw and did the same as me.Hooray ,then I turnd him loose and we both slept well!All the best everyone,what a wonderful world this is to have horses in it!

Hi Guys I thought star's (the aptly named welsh pony)story was worth mentioning here, it took a lot of patience and perserverance and constantly askingmyslef where I had made a mistake or pushed things too far with star and sometimes it fet like we moved forward massivly only to regress a day later for no aparent reason but we just worked slowly and consistently and got there in the end, I highly reccommend Kelly Marks books, handling the untouched horse, creting a boind with your horse and then as a follow up perfect manners - along with montys from my hands to yours. These books and the Intellegent horsenmanship training courses are what hekoed us get where we are now ;0) I also find that if I yawn or give a ong relaxing sigh (which will release any tension in me) that this helps greatly with nervous or tense horses (I have been riding out some green youngsters for a horse rehome charity and is one of the tactics I use when the horse meets something new that may cause a little tension adn I find it works very well in hand and under saddle.)
Good luck ramona and keep us updated with your progress ;0)

Thank you rowan,
I'm going to try this with my mare STAR. Yawning and a deep breath when I introduce anything to her.
I'll let you know if it works,
Thanks so much.